Another dream...

Some nights ago I had a very weird dream. Actually, it made more sense than my last one cos you can really tell what it was influenced by. I had to spend quite a lot of time during the last week using AutoCAD and Photoshop to complete my assignment. It wasnt hard after you got used to the commands in AutoCAD but you need like 4 commands just to initiate 1 action. And the commands are VERY specific. So it took a lot of time and we had to think strategicly about how much detail we wanted to put into the project. Funny how worked up you get by a simple drawing. I guess i could have turned in a half assed project and passed anyway. Somehow i just couldnt get the idea out of my head that if i didnt do it the way i wanted to I was going to fail. I started this project kinda late because I wanted to work on my essay first. I didnt want all the books to be checked out of the library and returned after they were due. To make matters worse, since it is partially based on the last assignment we did about photography and collaging I found out that making the shot more complicated was a bad idea in terms of labour intensity. And then there were the idiots who wouldnt stop talking throughout the day in the computer lab. They could have spared themselves a few hours of being there if they didnt bitch about being couped up in the Uni on a Friday night. And blasting music. As if I wasnt suffering enough. They had less work to do so they can take time out to blah blah about it. This was one of those moments where I want to snap and tell them off and be selfish about my needs. Like just have a burst of anger and burst everybody's bubble so that they can go cry in their blogger account on how some bitch ruined their already ruined evening. And I had another assignment our studio had to do that same week. Thank God they were both done on time. The next one is due next Friday and we were just given a new one yesterday.

Our studio is now moving on to design a house near Margaret river. We also have to do an abstract painting. We were assured that it didnt have to be too complicated. Ha. Right. It just has to make sense thats all. (have you ever tried making sense of abstract painting? and bearing in mind that this is not just about art its about presentation blah blah it has to look good, make it center to the sheet etc) I made a poster in digital media and it was supposed to look natural, but she said something like cut out the white border (that appeared while printing ,duh u cant print over the extent of the page) and even though its supposed to be natural you have to make this line straight etc. ugh. It wasnt even a technical drawing. I hope you got all that now be creative. -.- At least everything else but the studio is straightforward. Even the computer assignment. I think as a studio coordinator i prefer Charlie. He worked us harder but he also gave us more personal feedback and bothered to explain ideas to us. I almost understood why I didnt like my current one today when she didn t come into class. I guess its the charisma factor. She doesnt give us much of herself at all. THeres almost no need for her as long as we have the course outline. Its like all she ever does is demand ideas out of us and then tells us what does and doesnt work. Charlie did the same thing but I guess the difference is he wasnt afraid to tell us what he thought personally of it. I guess in essense i dislike her because of my own weakness. Shes not helpful to me because shes the same as me? I cant talk or even argue with her unless she has an opinion other than whats wrong with the picture technically instead of the concept behind the design. Its frustrating because it inverts what i think of her back at me and i wonder if what i have come up with actually worth discussing or analysing anyway. Like maybe its just not creative enough to deserve her attention. People who do get her attention do well enough without her help and its like they are so sure of what they have to do they can justify any decision they make even if it breaks conventional rules.

So it came to be that i had a dream where i was in Charlie's studio and I was really happy about it cos we were certain to do something fun and challenging. And he told us that we were going on this trip on a spaceship into outerspace to survey the land for a space colony we were going to design. You can imagine how excited he was because it was going to be something revolutionary and we were going to be the ones who designed it and our designs could possibly set the foundation as a source of inspiration for this new civilisation or whatever. And in my dream something went horribly wrong and I didnt finish this assignment that i need to complete in order to go. As I remember Charlie was pretty astounded by this not to mention terribly dissappointed at me. He asked me in my dream "Do you actually enjoy feeling useless?"
No I dont. No one does. He wouldnt say that to me in reality but he is the type to say that looks rubbish or crap or whatever. I kinda wonder why this should affect me. Its like I aspire to be as charismatic as he is and if he were to ever say that to me it would be like affirming that it is a hopeless aspiration for someone like me. Well, in real life at least i got the assignments done. As for being creative I just have to try harder and be more certain about things. Just have to find out what those 'things' are.

Yay! Art blitz!

Last Friday I met a fellow otaku at the library. She was supposed to be doing the same thing as me but she lapsed into anime. Ouch. Her boyfriend didnt know what to do with her so he dropped her at the library to research. Right, treat the library as a nursery for uni students why dont you. Guess it was a fitting for her to just sit there and draw then. Like a goood little girl. She even took out an art book for farm animal to reference drawing animals. Like horses for example. And she even drew the Riders of the Apocalyse. (As bishonen....) She was actually very good. I love how she draws guys. Note to self. If youre ever going to show anyone your artbook, clear out anything you wont want others to see. Like yaoi. Couldnt help thinking that i wish i could draw like that too 0.o
She did a quick sketch of Esther after I told her about her. It was too big to fit the printer so thats y it had to be at such a weird angle.